two-guys-straddling:

"If Frankie gets evicted I’ll stop watching"

879
  • me as a pedestrian: [catwalks slowly across street as 90 cars pile up behind each other trying to turn; throws modelesque glance backwards over designer shades] [car inches into crosswalk] HOW DARE YOU COME WITHIN FIVE FEET OF ME!? I HAVE THE FUCKING RIGHT OF WAY??? SEE YOU IN COURT YOU CAPITALIST, PLANET-DESTROYING SCUM
  • me driving: say your prayers
  • lizziemcganja:

    friend: i’m getting mcdonalds you want anything?

    me: i don’t have money

    friend: it’s all good, i’ll pay

    me:

    "please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay. please be gay."
    sacred chant of the homosexual  (via offwithurhead)
    297

    jocastaodoms:

    bbcan2

    bb16

    blackabsol:

    when you bottom for the first time after being a top all your life 

    220
    hypersexualsportswear:

kick a soccer ball into my ass tbh
    280